AdEtOlA’s Diary – Episode 1

Dear diary,

This story can be said to have started out as a coincidence, but like I always say “nothing is ever a coincidence”… in my world at least. My name is Adetola Oshinuga and this is the story of my life in brief.
The text came in like any other message I get on the regular, it was an MTN credit card of N1500 worth and even though I didn’t have the number saved on my phone, I loaded the credit anyway. I apparently assumed it to have been from Davis, my commissioner boyfriend whom I asked to renew my internet subscription. He liked using different numbers to call me and always insisted he does all the calling so I didn’t even bother calling back. Almost immediately, Sayo & his friends came around to pick my friends and I to the club so I took my mind off the credit briskly and didn’t even bother getting a confirmation from Davis in any way.

I got home earlier than planned because I got into a little fight with Sayo at the club. He acts like he owns me too much when in the real sense he’s just a struggling ‘yahoo boy’ trying to make ends meet, I blame it all on his shallow mind though. After the fight, I made up my mind never to see him again before things got out of hand. Coming out of the bathroom after my shower, I saw 11 missed calls on my phone, apparently Sayo had been calling and that just pissed me off the more. The next call and I answered it vehemently, ranting profusely at the caller whom I expected to be Sayo of course; only for me to hear a different voice trying to calm me down.

This voice was really soothing and he sounded really mature over the phone with the first “Hello” not crucifying me as to why I hadn’t called earlier et al. He introduced himself as Kunle and told me he had mistakenly sent me a message as he mistyped the number. I had already loaded the card and so started stammering… trying to make him understand I was going to resend another the next day, even though all I wanted to hear was “never mind, you don’t have to” (LOL). I was so tired; I didn’t even know when I slept off hence, the next morning, I awoken to his text telling me I didn’t have to get it as he had long sent another to his intended recipient. He also made jest of me because I slept off while he was talking. I kinda felt foolish and embarrassed though, but was glad he wasn’t rude or the sort. He appeared to be a really nice guy and requested my permission to keep in touch and so, by Saturday, we had already started gisting. He surprisingly didn’t ask for my pin, he didn’t even ask if I was on BBM, he just kept calling and as such, within just a few days, I had learnt so many things about him, and he, about me.
Kunle was in his early 40’s, had two kids and a pregnant wife, but had them all outside the country. He was usually bored especially on weekends and didn’t mind being my friend to keep him company (at least, that’s what he said). I obviously didn’t mind keeping him as a “friend” either. He told me he stayed at chevron estate, Lekki and all I could calculate was how much he could spend on me (I was definitely glad). Just as if he read my mind, he was fast to tell me I could come around whenever I wanted, and even with my friends to “have fun”. As a 300L babe in her mid-semester, I was pitifully nearing broke point, and wanted badly to be upgraded plus I already perceived Kunle to be a “Mr nice guy”. We had an arrangement and by Friday, I was ready to leave for Lagos with Sharon, my bestie. I packed two sexy short gowns hoping to drop jaws wherever we went to “have fun”, my lingerie and bikini not forgetting to keep a pack of condoms in my wallet… (STDs are real o). It was going to be one of the best weekends ever, I had promised myself as you know, we obsessed girls cannot be responsible for our actions, or can we? I was obsessed with money, being broke was not my thing. We arrived Lagos at exactly 2pm, and decided to take a red cab (as a lekki bobo that he was na, I was determined to spend his money). As soon as we got to chevron estate, his number was not reachable, as such we decided to pay the cabbie ourselves (vex money comes in handy) and chill at a famous eatery around. While we gisted and thought about so many awkward situations, should “Mr nice guy” not show up, his call came in and then I described our location. I knew instantly he was the one I’d been talking to on phone when he stepped into the section we were and the smell of Creed was all over. During one of our very few but lengthy conversations within the past days, he told me he loved perfumes a lot and usually went for the best. He even told me he would have me pick my choice whenever I came around as he specifically bought for peeps.

He was tall, dark and handsome (just like I liked them) and I was immediately taken aback when I remembered he was married and only a “parol”. He seemed too cool to be resisted and I smiled sheepishly as he stepped towards us, not forgetting to confirm my name as he stretched forth his hand for a handshake. I couldn’t stop fondling with my phone, not particularly searching for anything; he just didn’t seem as interesting as he sounded on phone. I went through BBM status updates repeatedly and briefly checked my TL on twitter until I heard him sadly coo saying his wife was returning into the country that night as she had just lost her mum, who was to be buried that weekend. No wonder he was acting all quiet at first, guess he didn’t want me to regret coming all the way and probably for “nothing”. He opted to move us to a hotel to freshen up before taking us out for some drinks at the mall to keep the night alive. I was back to my normal self and just kept trying to engage him in discussions while Sharon didn’t stop disturbing with pings to tell me he was really cute and she didn’t mind having a threesome.
Sharon and I went way back from secondary school (ask about us from any queens college babe and you’re not far from booking an appointment *wink*). She was my partner up until I decided I wanted some “bananas” too. We decided to still stick around for each other and even dated the same set of guys.

We got to Shoprite at about 9:30pm (yeah, I always kept track of time because I was always going through my phone), got a few drinks and took dinner then he asked us to go round the mall and pick stuffs we wanted. Trust me with an open check, I picked two very beautiful gowns (I was a short gown freak because peeps always told me I had sexy legs) and Sharon who was pretending to be a nice girl took a very nice Chanel sunglasses. We left for the hotel in a hurry when he got this call and as much as he tried to hide his impatience, I could read it on his almost straight face, I therefore came to a conclusion that we would leave the next day (at least, there were still many other weekends). Morning came and we ordered fried plantain with snail sauce for breakfast, feeling bad our fun was cut short but was glad we went shopping and were still going to get “awoof” money when leaving. Sharon and I had a quickie before he came around to drive us to the park where we could get a cab and just as we were about getting off, he gave me an envelope I was sure contained “a lot of” money. Instead of me to just thank him and leave, I decided to give him a very long and unexpected “we-could-try-this-again” kiss. He responded positively and almost didn’t want to stop when he heard the knock on his side window.
“Hi Kunle, sorry to cut you short, heard Bola is coming this weekend for mama’s burial, is she around yet?”
She sounded really stern, almost not waiting for him to even wind down; I wondered what the expression on her face was. He obviously felt uncomfortable but started replying and I made out to leave the car when I heard it and stopped. It was only family members that called me that; I wasn’t based in Lagos again and didn’t remember having any close relative who stayed around, plus goodness it was morning who was this jobless person who knew my native name? I slowly turned around, looking up, kinda fidgety. Lo and behold, it was Aunty Moji, dad’s “aburo”, I froze!

(To be continued…next week tuesday) Make it a date!

‘kisses always!